I’ve talked about listening to the needs of our bodies before, not only as an element of a happier healthier life but to maintain productivity and quality in the long run. I still struggle with this concept personally, but if I keep pushing I will burn out physically and mentally.
I did better when I faced a medical mix up this time; I didn’t even get upset. I didn’t become depressed and freeze either; I adapted and slowed down. Though I have learned to better regulate my emotions, I still feel the echos of anger and, more accurately, resentment. If I didn’t have so many complex health issues, if I hadn’t been born at 24 weeks, I wouldn’t need to slow down and/or stop nearly as often. Imagine all the extra things I could do. And no, I don’t mean if I didn’t have Cerebral Palsy and use a walker, I mean the layers of illness on top of each other.
I know, “It could be worse.” That is true, but my feelings are reasonable and legit. Looking at others with pity has never lifted me up, what keeps me getting up over and over is knowing that there is a better out their for me, a better I deserve. Whether it exists in another income bracket, another country, or in my own creativity, the only way to get there is to keep going. Sometimes it means I slow down to care for myself, but I never stop permanently. You shouldn’t either.
Thanks for taking the time to check in and for your patience, take care!