The good, the bad, the frightful, the funny, everything moves ang changes. Some people follow the flow of the world easily, whether they started from a better position, or are purely exceptional at the art of rolling with the punches. I lost my psychological and emotional elasticity at age sixteen, and gave myself a beating fighting with my demons! Since I began the healing process I’ve noticed that for chunks of time I can overcome any obstacle. But in those in-between times, one hard blow can knock me down and I stagnate in impossibilities.
Time, and the rest of existence moves on, even if we don’t. When we are unable or unwilling to change, it’s easy to feel trapped in some weird space/time anomaly, and humanity is not built for that. We need growth to feel good, even if the process of growing feels AWFUL!
Sometimes, we do the best we can, and still feel awful, because of things relating to biology, or the social world and our particular uniqueness. These are not necessarily things we can, or should, change. A generalized personal example follows:
If we stay at that vomit-inducing job (stress-vomiting is not a joke, I’ve been there.) why do we stay? if we realize that we need the -____ provided by what we’re doing, but hate the job itself, we can look for another job. Yes, it takes extra energy we don’t have in the short term, but humans are better at sprints than sustained running, We can bounce back from exhaustion better than we can from burnout.
If a depressive or uncomfortable internal state persists, we can only feel better when something changes. Sometimes the change feels impossible, or even more uncomfortable at the first attempt than the gnawing discomforts we know, again, I’ve been there, Anorexia is no joke, for example.) Keep trying, more than once, or twice. Set an amount of time that you will stick to a new activity or approach at something, if you don’t feel better after that, try something new.
The good news is that a lot of thing naturally fluctuate, and given time the down gets up, and the mourners carry the lost with them into the future. We get sick and we mend, tired and we sleep, if we wait. If there is no light at the end of your tunnel (whichever tunnel you are in) create a light, or ask people along your route for help creating it.