I Will be…

I have witnessed chaos,

and the blood pooled under my skin

Blessedly blinded by my silent fury

Frozen by the cabinet of fears screeching

inert amid the slaughtering of dreams,

Time marched on, over my curled up body.

I didn’t notice the boots thundering down,

Photo by Alex Fu on Pexels.com

but, as I sat up with fresh bruises and saw the walls,

as a prisoner of war I bled thoughts.

The doubting spirits of thousands

watched at a distance, waiting to be a part of this history as I bled-out.

words pooled from my mouth.

some spattered across the dim walls

from repeated wounds to my consent.

the blood cells that heal

those that say, “In the future, I will…

Be fearless in the face of pain,

Remember who I am,

Trust and respect her,

find joy,

or perhaps just calm…”

My Someday was dieing

faster than the cells of my spirit could be renewed.

the safety of stillness waned,

and offered fear that could not release,

its message without a tongue.

It’s sounds without meaning

it took a dacade to stop the bleeding,

and the echo of my enemies’ shouting

when I unfurled and began to stand, defiant

still bellow like gernades.

forcing the false light of death through dark moments,

and dark months.

I still catch those embers from time to time

I use them to light my memory of the possible,

and my path into the future.


Published by sickybeat

I am a writer with an extremely active imagination. I love learning answers to questions and what makes everything and everyone tick. I am a "Unique case, medically" if nothing else. I am flawed in my extreme aversion to failure (even when "success" isn't good for me,) but have come a long way in ditching the perfectionist mindset. I like people whose default setting toward others is compassion, an open mind, and honesty

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