Access to Sunlight

June 1st 2019,

I climbed twenty-two stairs

Walked, stumbled,

through a kitchen in-between

The first day, I marvel at the roof,

of all things.

Disorientation lasted 6 months.

By the end of the year,

I was twerking at a Shania Twain concert in Las Vegas,

In leopard-print wedges.

And yet,

Two days after Christmas

I could not breathe,

Bones melted in my skin.

It would be 3 days into 2020

Before the blood loss

Pneumonia,

And blood clot

Was resolved.

It was the longest stint,

Outside my room

In two+ years.

Covid19 set in.

I set myself to work,

Studying,

Motivational interviewing,

Attachment theory,

Latin,

Finnish,

Arabic,

Gaelic,

Spanish,

Singing practice,

LSAT,

And,

my states administrative rules

Passed the LSAT

And prepared

For law school.

In all that time,

I likely left one room for 300 hours

Out of approximately 17,161 hours.

I learned to appreciate that life,

Even without freedom of movement.

I was not imprisoned.

Today I sit in my own apartment,

Can take my walker or wheelchair

Outside as I please,

I do not regret living in a room,

Using a camode,

Or lacking running water,

Because it forced me to slow down,

Think creatively,

And appreciate freedom of movement

While teaching me freedom of mind.

Published by sickybeat

I am a writer with an extremely active imagination. I love learning answers to questions and what makes everything and everyone tick. I am a "Unique case, medically" if nothing else. I am flawed in my extreme aversion to failure (even when "success" isn't good for me,) but have come a long way in ditching the perfectionist mindset. I like people whose default setting toward others is compassion, an open mind, and honesty

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