It’s hard to not thinktaking up spaceIs magnetized a bulletTo the metal bulleton my chest I walked into a Courthouse,One for the “little people”even as I am a rung aboveAnd climbing, I feel the urge to explain,To repent,for taking up spaceI know my value And my otherness I cannot shake the delusionThat it is myContinue reading “Space”
Category Archives: Identity
Competing
With myself Is possible if I can except that The payoff isn’t scenes now But, in the years to come. No one else will know the cost. I march forward.
Loud. A Hammer for a Screw
Loud was a personality trait Loud and proud. The silence quicksand I fought. But sound, Is so often the tearing open Of emotional scars An auditory, “That isn’t my reality! See me! Hear me!” Because I expect that all society sees, At best, Is “inspiration porn” And I cut off my nose To spite them.Continue reading “Loud. A Hammer for a Screw”
Opinionated Girls Like me.
We aren’t safe to argue last In a group of “to be’s” The opinionated girls Get worked up Needled for hours And holding back For hours. And when the judge, Honored or haughty, Calls your case, Only to lead you, Hands and feet tied, To a firing line of questions, Where only the mouth canContinue reading “Opinionated Girls Like me.”
Process and Pricing
If “just writ(ing) down what comes” Is the cure for writer’s block; I must relapse every other day. The flow has yet to strike, I hear of a non-discript ‘zone ‘ But, much like science fiction, It has no address or code. Thus, empty white electrons Whose shine demands space, Give me vertigo Until blanketedContinue reading “Process and Pricing”
Year One
Two deaths, 38 migraines, One fuzzy terror love-ball. One ER Visit, With no care. Eight passing grades! Eight passing grades!! Three visits from a cute baby-ok- maybe not so baby-niece, And each one perfection. Thousands of doubts, And hundreds of millions of questions, of self, and material. And I more will come. [To my family]
Repetitive Resentment
I came in bleeding to death slowly I learned, applied, and passed. Barely. But law isn’t built form me to access Let alone dictate, like the rest. I don’t mold my world, I build it from the abyss I go to the doctor And she, in 2022, Tells me she couldn’t see me having childrenContinue reading “Repetitive Resentment”
Endings
I ache at each, Soothing, or stabbing The best or the most destructive, The viability of the ending, Matters less than the pages rising, And collapsing on their brethren. When all have stopped, I continue. If only in my aching for every single one. Empathy and trauma so woven There is no separation. And yet,Continue reading “Endings”
I am light
Refracting in a trillion directions The secret to a rainbow, And loud without a sound Burning without fire Artificial and true My existence will change you
Where i am
For 4 years of being “well” I stand in the old shadows of ill I can tell you where I am now But the answer to “How did I get here?” Is in shards throughout my limbs. But, When lost in life, I never forget I am here
SickyBeat 