hope – SickyBeat

Endings

I ache at each, Soothing, or stabbing The best or the most destructive, The viability of the ending, Matters less than the pages rising, And collapsing on their brethren. When all have stopped, I continue. If only in my aching for every single one. Empathy and trauma so woven There is no separation. And yet,Continue reading “Endings”

Propaganda

Propagating As in seeds. Propagating a different kind of seeds Seeds of ideas Only the hearty, Fear, hate, and othering Survive. Other seeds planted budding Until they are overtaken by The weeds of propagation. Growing faster than a wildfire spreading in a dry summer windstorm. May we learn the wisdom of the wilderness Before weContinue reading “Propaganda”

Let There Be Darkness

Monday I was exhausted, Because of the dropping iron. Tuesday one word: menstruation. Wednesday, I don’t even remember. And Thursday, oh fuck Thursday. School lockdown, Migraine number 1, Two classes, And a grade that made me cry. I am better, I have been giving, working and trying And this grade, one of few is noneContinue reading “Let There Be Darkness”

Got Motivation?

I don’t. Which is not to say life’s not good. I just wonder, What life would be like, If I wasn’t always breathless. I would prefer life was a series of sprints Because my body, Good as she serves me, Is not designed for marathons. Until that happens, I’ll have to push on With onlyContinue reading “Got Motivation?”

The Day

It will come, When you wake up, And the stress is outside the self Rather than rooted and emanating From inches above the soul. The stress is there, You see it, Live through it, And come out the other side. You won’t always smile, But you will find that strength That has been aging likeContinue reading “The Day”

Thanks Body.

For once I can say, thank you body” Without a hint of sarcasm. Because I actually woke up awake! On a day when it matters! I don’t know if it will make a difference, But it gives me hope, and gratitude. Thanks bod!

How Far

From dead woman walking (Constantly) To a student killing it The distance between them Is well beyond five lines. If you asked me how I got here, Persistent, effort-full stumbling, In the direction that scared me most. Change, has that power. And, the power to heal.

I am Here.

One week in- And I am adapting to 4am And 2 hour classes Twice a day. And two two-hour study bursts, Two-twenty-minute meals, $10,000 left in fees, And a 10:30pm bedtime, so I don’t collapse, That is actually 11pm And I am here.

The Ember of Opportunity

At the edge of triple digit heat There is an ember floating In the air so humid That it’s easy to think It won’t catch. But don’t be fooled I am most free, Most stable, Amid water. And I will spread. Everyone will be marked, Some by a warm hug, Others by a passionate charingContinue reading “The Ember of Opportunity”

In Honor of The Good

They need someone to change their world From one woman, and her deteriorating inner world. The mother who never really was. Almost, There was a night, Always on Saturdays That I could find a mother hidden behind the defensive, broken, girl. On Saturday she would make her homemade stir-fry, With peas from her garden. And,Continue reading “In Honor of The Good”